"Why I do what I do?"
I was asked this question a minute ago. At that time I probably gave a straight answer and one that was most heart-felt. However, as I sit in my bed like many nights I think to myself about a lot of things. And, one that keeps crawling in my head over & over again is why I do this? And how this movement become a part of me?
I thought about this question and I have came to a ultimate conclusion about why. Now part is this equation is partly what I told the lady at that Mike Brown Rally. However, to understand a human being's passion and/or purpose in life I had to look deep into myself to understand.
I guess every human comes across their passion and purpose by divine intervention. Human Beings came across their dreams by GOD, who in fact knew Us about we came out of Our Mother Womb. Now before I explain my divine life's "awakening", I would like too say every man will came across a single event or events that will give him true insight into what his passion is. For dreams and human purpose are two different things.
Anyway, my big "awakening" was probably Trayvon Martin. I have always been aware of some things that kids my own age where not aware of. I have always been blessed to be a little wiser than my own age. However, when the Trayvon verdict came back; for the first time in my life I felt such an overwhelming feeling of powerlessness. I was not fully a men, so I guess I can't say someone took away my manhood. However, the very decision that was made let me know deep down; that my life meant nothing to those I trusted so innocently.
I was sitting in the parking lot just feeling lost. I could feel something leaving my body, but at that time I did not know what it was. At that very moment the very last ounce of childhood and pure naïve mind I had left was robbed from me.
That's that best why to explain it. However, as my very innocence was being stripped from me; in the very days and months I gained something that will carry me until the day I take my last breath. I gained my passion and I gained my purpose. I always wanted justice as a kid; I loved superheroes and comics. Further, as a kid I never wanted to see anyone get hurt or treated unfair. But, on that very night from seeing the events fold on TV and then finally coming out of shock as I still listen in my car's radio; I had a out of body experience.
Deep down I find a fire in my soul that even I could not have lit. Only GOD and the very thing I lacked that most (the hate, hurt, and anger) unlocked something already in me. On that day I finally gave birth to my destiny.
What is my destiny and what is my purpose you may ask?
My purpose and passion in life is countless in number but related in the blood, sweat, tears, suffering, and hurt of anyone who has ever been wronged by the unhumanane mistreatment of innocent people from the very "system" that swears it is "just." On that day Trayvon was my Big Brother, on that day the system wronged me, on that day my very soul became a sacrifice or pawn in a game that has been never ending.
I began to feel that pain of a single mother who can't feed her kids, I felt that pain of a Young Brother who wants to go to college but can't because "financial aid" isn't enough, I felt the pain of that dad who wants to provide for his family but can't because he was locked-up or is lock-up. I finally began to clearly see the unfairness about how parents have to enter a "lottery" for their child to have a advocate education. I mean is this really 2015, have times really changed. A father is killed on camera, the very cameras that are supposed to be the answer to being safe in society and no justice is served. I mean a active dad is choked because he had cigarettes and nothing happens. Security cameras are there to serve "justice" when a teenage single-mom steals formula and diapers for her infant, but not when something "truly and actually" illegal happens.
I mean two African-American Males died because of "cigarettes." A pack of cigarettes are worth someone life. I mean the very cigarettes that are worth more "on the inside." However, we are outside in Our own neighborhoods for GOD'S Sake and the penalty for cigarettes is DEATH.
Man, I can't believe that. However, every time this happens I get that same feeling I did on that on that very dark night. I got a sense of angry and urgency. Sadness and suddenness. Awakening and aggressive hunger for this to be a nightmare; which would mean I am not literally awoke in the tragedy we call "today's society."
That why I do what I do. Real talk, I do what I do for no one has to go through the hurt I do. No one has to go through life feeling "powerless." I do what I do for those who need to be "awoken." I do this so that when GOD Blesses me with kids, "injustice" will just be a word on a page. A obsolete word on a page like something from a different time and dimension. And although, I unfortunately know that crimes will always exist; I hope to finally be the generation that ends the "real-crimes" of this world. And not the "crimes" that others have deemed as and now currently profiting from.
In closing, why do I do what I do?
I do what I do because I am a African-American Male who wants to change things (for myself and my Brothers/Sisters). I do what I do because it is my purpose in life. I do what I do because I don't want another one of my Brown Sister's or Brother's life to be exterminated like some pest. I do what I do simply because it is the only thing to do. Furthermore, I do what I do because when Eric Garner, Trayvon Martin, and many more (name and unnamed) died; something else died that day: My sense of Justice. However, I will do anything I can to do to make sure not another person is a victim of this world's injustice.
I was asked this question a minute ago. At that time I probably gave a straight answer and one that was most heart-felt. However, as I sit in my bed like many nights I think to myself about a lot of things. And, one that keeps crawling in my head over & over again is why I do this? And how this movement become a part of me?
I thought about this question and I have came to a ultimate conclusion about why. Now part is this equation is partly what I told the lady at that Mike Brown Rally. However, to understand a human being's passion and/or purpose in life I had to look deep into myself to understand.
I guess every human comes across their passion and purpose by divine intervention. Human Beings came across their dreams by GOD, who in fact knew Us about we came out of Our Mother Womb. Now before I explain my divine life's "awakening", I would like too say every man will came across a single event or events that will give him true insight into what his passion is. For dreams and human purpose are two different things.
Anyway, my big "awakening" was probably Trayvon Martin. I have always been aware of some things that kids my own age where not aware of. I have always been blessed to be a little wiser than my own age. However, when the Trayvon verdict came back; for the first time in my life I felt such an overwhelming feeling of powerlessness. I was not fully a men, so I guess I can't say someone took away my manhood. However, the very decision that was made let me know deep down; that my life meant nothing to those I trusted so innocently.
I was sitting in the parking lot just feeling lost. I could feel something leaving my body, but at that time I did not know what it was. At that very moment the very last ounce of childhood and pure naïve mind I had left was robbed from me.
That's that best why to explain it. However, as my very innocence was being stripped from me; in the very days and months I gained something that will carry me until the day I take my last breath. I gained my passion and I gained my purpose. I always wanted justice as a kid; I loved superheroes and comics. Further, as a kid I never wanted to see anyone get hurt or treated unfair. But, on that very night from seeing the events fold on TV and then finally coming out of shock as I still listen in my car's radio; I had a out of body experience.
Deep down I find a fire in my soul that even I could not have lit. Only GOD and the very thing I lacked that most (the hate, hurt, and anger) unlocked something already in me. On that day I finally gave birth to my destiny.
What is my destiny and what is my purpose you may ask?
My purpose and passion in life is countless in number but related in the blood, sweat, tears, suffering, and hurt of anyone who has ever been wronged by the unhumanane mistreatment of innocent people from the very "system" that swears it is "just." On that day Trayvon was my Big Brother, on that day the system wronged me, on that day my very soul became a sacrifice or pawn in a game that has been never ending.
I began to feel that pain of a single mother who can't feed her kids, I felt that pain of a Young Brother who wants to go to college but can't because "financial aid" isn't enough, I felt the pain of that dad who wants to provide for his family but can't because he was locked-up or is lock-up. I finally began to clearly see the unfairness about how parents have to enter a "lottery" for their child to have a advocate education. I mean is this really 2015, have times really changed. A father is killed on camera, the very cameras that are supposed to be the answer to being safe in society and no justice is served. I mean a active dad is choked because he had cigarettes and nothing happens. Security cameras are there to serve "justice" when a teenage single-mom steals formula and diapers for her infant, but not when something "truly and actually" illegal happens.
I mean two African-American Males died because of "cigarettes." A pack of cigarettes are worth someone life. I mean the very cigarettes that are worth more "on the inside." However, we are outside in Our own neighborhoods for GOD'S Sake and the penalty for cigarettes is DEATH.
Man, I can't believe that. However, every time this happens I get that same feeling I did on that on that very dark night. I got a sense of angry and urgency. Sadness and suddenness. Awakening and aggressive hunger for this to be a nightmare; which would mean I am not literally awoke in the tragedy we call "today's society."
That why I do what I do. Real talk, I do what I do for no one has to go through the hurt I do. No one has to go through life feeling "powerless." I do what I do for those who need to be "awoken." I do this so that when GOD Blesses me with kids, "injustice" will just be a word on a page. A obsolete word on a page like something from a different time and dimension. And although, I unfortunately know that crimes will always exist; I hope to finally be the generation that ends the "real-crimes" of this world. And not the "crimes" that others have deemed as and now currently profiting from.
In closing, why do I do what I do?
I do what I do because I am a African-American Male who wants to change things (for myself and my Brothers/Sisters). I do what I do because it is my purpose in life. I do what I do because I don't want another one of my Brown Sister's or Brother's life to be exterminated like some pest. I do what I do simply because it is the only thing to do. Furthermore, I do what I do because when Eric Garner, Trayvon Martin, and many more (name and unnamed) died; something else died that day: My sense of Justice. However, I will do anything I can to do to make sure not another person is a victim of this world's injustice.
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